The Unbearable Blightness of "Showing"

Oh boy, what a weekend.
I wish I could say that in a nice way.

I was "showing" this weekend while 'Drew had a holiday at the park.

I'm almost at a loss for words at the horror of it all. The pictures tell thousands of words.

First, the humiliation of the bath is captured digitally for everyone to see from now until . . . the end of time which, could be none too soon given the way I'm feeling.

Then comes the cutting -- look at it; they are taking off my bleeding hair! I need that hair just in case I decide to be a water dog. What are they thinking? Okay, enough on the water dog topic.

Finally, the ultimate in degradation, humiliation, and intolerable suffering. He puts me in some kind of caged enclosure in which I cannot even move while 'Drew is subjected to the same cruel and unusual punishment in the bath torture. He says, "Satchie, I need to put you in there to keep you clean for the show". My first thought is to soil myself but that would mean another round of refurbishing. It's not worth it.

Then there are the two days of running around the ring when all I want to be doing is wrestling with 'Drew. What's the point? The judge (a plonker if ever there was one) has not a clue. They should have used her in the "Where's The Beef" commercial.
Some of the other dogs I spoke with actually like it. Unbelievable!!

I have to figure a way out of the show world. I can't bite anyone because that would not be Newfilicious. Maybe when the judge grabs my unmentionables I could pee on her. Hey, I like that idea if I don't say so myself.

The misery had ended for about a month, and there was some silver lining in the horror. Karazan Wesley (who turns out to be a half brother --- thanks for telling me Dad) took Open Dog and Winner's Dog for his first major, and he's only been in two shows. And, we met a guy who has some relationship with our Daddy, Phantom, who lives in the U.K. There are some puppy pictures of my pappy on lifeguardnewf.com. So I suppose, in the end and after all the torture, it was worth it. And, now I'm home cuddling up with my best buddy Andrew. Maybe things aren't so bad after all.

Sleep well Wesley. Aunt Claire, you nailed it! Aunt Terri, thanks so much!

I'm on my way to 'Drew because "'Drew, I love you."


Satchie

"I Am Horror"

The title of today's entry came from a friend, an Italian friend, after seeing The Exorcist.

It is appropriate as today we are going (again) up to the kennels to get refurbished for a show this weekend. What's the point? It's raining today and is supposed to rain all weekend.

Somebody try to explain this to me: they are going to put me in the tub, wash me, spend a couple of hours drying me, all so that I can go into a ridiculous ring just to get wet again?

I mean, I don't mind the getting wet part, but what's the point of the complete refurbishing and wholesale ruination of what might otherwise be a day when 'Drew I and could by playing?

I'll bet Gizzy doesn't get treated like this. I'll bet he's out romping in the snow.


Sigh (again),

Satchie

Coal In My Stocking

Okay, enough.

I'm so serious about this adoption thing that I'm running away tonight, with good cause, as set forth below:

Yesterday, we again get dragged up to the kennels and put into the fenced-in pasture while he plays with the pups, takes Paris for a walk, takes Gaia for a walk, takes Baylo for a walk, takes Murray (come on Louie was a much better name) for a walk, and generally disregards us for several hours. I'm at an utter loss over this go up to the kennels so he can play with other Newfies!!!! Aunt Heidi is witness to this cruel and unusual punishment. So, as you can see, the ride home was rather depressing. (Is it true vets prescribe Prozac for dogs?)

Then, today, in some sort of sadistic, humanistic ritual, he puts collars with bells on us and "Santa" hats and takes pictures so the whole world can view our humiliation and degradation. I'd have preferred two slabs of coal in a stocking. And he thinks I'm showing this weekend when Andrew has a hall pass? Ha!!

Tonight, I'm packing up my stuff, putting a leash on Andrew, and getting out of here. I'm not sure where we're going but anywhere else must be better (not them kennels though).


Sigh,

Satchie

The Newfoundland Dog

Here's an article that "fumigates some wisdom" about us:

"There are few facts and much speculation about the origins of the Newfoundland Dog. Almost everyone who’s written a book about Newfs offers a variation on the breed’s genesis. There isn’t even consensus that there was an indigenous canine as the foundation. Some believe that the Newfoundland Dog was created solely through the interbreeding of various breeds brought from Europe by early fishermen.

The greatest consensus is on the place of origin – the island of Newfoundland. The commonest theory is that the native people on the island had the foundation canines, and that these dogs descended from Tibetan Mastiffs with two possible sources of this heritage. One conjecture is that when people migrated from Asia to Alaska, across what was then a land or ice bridge, they brought Tibetan Mastiffs with them. The other possibility is that the Vikings brought their big black bear dogs with them when they briefly colonized Newfoundland around ad 1000.

Some of these dogs, thought to be descended from Tibetan Mastiffs, were probably left behind and bred with native dogs. Modern speculation is that this latter happening was a reinforcement of the original heritage. There is also general agreement that various European dogs contributed to the genetic mix.

Another common belief is that the Newfoundland Dog, or its immediate ancestors, evolved on the island of Newfoundland in a semi-wild state.

Colonization of the island was restricted in the early years. Fishing admirals are said to have sent ships up and down the coast to burn down any homes with chimneys. This was done to force settlers to return to Europe for the winter, hence preventing permanent settlements and the governments that would follow.

Early writings claim that the big black dogs, left to their own devices for half the year, were not adept at catching food on land. In winter, this left only fish in the icy cold waters and the suggestion is that the dogs evolved into an underwater cold-water mammal like the polar bear. To this day, the Newfoundland is as different from other canine breeds as the polar bear is from other subspecies of bears.

History

In the 1700s, a large and powerful dog that worked extremely well on both land and sea was getting noticed. This dog was referred to by various names such as Bear Dog and Greater St. John’s Dog. It wasn’t until 1775 that the name “Newfoundland dog” first came into use.

At sea, the Newfoundland became the sailor’s darling. The dog had many uses, such as taking lines to shore, retrieving objects from the sea, carrying objects between ships, rescuing men who went overboard and helping to pull in fishing nets. They were equally useful on land doing draft work. They hauled the catch from the fishing boats and delivered fish and other merchandise door to door with their carts. Probably the most exotic of the door-to-door deliveries was the Royal Mail, which was transported in special wooden carts. Newfs in teams hauled the mail by sled between towns.

The Newfoundland Dog ran into trouble in its native land at the end of the 18th century. The best specimens were exported in great numbers to Europe, primarily to England, and the Government of Newfoundland restricted families from owning more than one dog, making any breed development on the island virtually impossible. Fortunately, the English carried out the breed’s ongoing development, especially in terms of the mastiff-type muzzle that makes modern Newfs look so different from their early ancestors, along with a longer neck, larger size and level bite.

Lord Byron summed up the wonderful respect the Newfoundland gained outside its native land with the famous epitaph for his beloved Newf, ‘Boatswain,’ who died in 1808: “... Beauty without Vanity, Strength without Insolence, Courage without Ferocity, and all the virtues of Man without his vices....”

Another Newfoundland Dog named ‘Boatswain’ was credited with altering human history. When Napoleon was escaping from his island exile in 1814, the non-swimmer emperor fell overboard, unnoticed in the dark except by the ship’s Newf who saved him, allowing him to go on to meet his Waterloo.

In the 1830s, Newfs performed a special type of rescue. After losing most of their St. Bernard breeding stock from disease and avalanches, the monks resurrected the famous giant Alpine-rescue dogs by crossing them with the giant water-rescue dogs. The rough or long coats found to this day on some Saints is a testimony to this event.

Although black was the Newfoundland’s original colour, the dogs arrived in England in a variety of colours, which were then almost eliminated. However, in 1837, the renowned painter Sir Edwin Landseer started painting white-and-black Newfoundlands and Queen Victoria acquired one such dog. The colour variation subsequently became the rage in England and the dogs became known as “Landseers.” This term is still in use in Canada, the United States and the United Kingdom; however the rest of the world has, since 1960, recognized another breed descended from white-and-black Newfoundland Dogs and the new breed has co-opted the name.

The Newfoundland has never been more popular than it was in the Victorian era when they became the “in” dog, renowned as children’s companions and protectors. This breed characteristic was reflected in children’s books of the time, the most famous J.M. Barrie’s story Peter Pan, which featured a Newfoundland nanny named ‘Nana.’

By the early 20th century, people were enamoured of the gentle bear-like dog and this, coupled with the fact that news reporting was somewhat less than diligent, resulted in some tales that are now being debunked by researchers.

The story of ‘Rigel,’ the Newfoundland Dog who saved the occupants of one of the Titanic’s lifeboats, and the legend of a Newf saving all the crew and passengers of the SS Ethie off the coast of Newfoundland in 1919, are now thought to have been fabricated.

Strict food rationing during World War I nearly caused the breed’s extinction. In 1923, only 23 Newfs were registered in Britain; by 1928, the number had climbed to just 75. National Geographic had declared the breed extinct in America.

Fortunately, a few dedicated breeders from England, Switzerland, the Netherlands, the United States and Canada fought to save the breed. In Canada, we are indebted to the Hon. Harold Macpherson, who founded the famous Westerland Kennels in St. John’s, Nfld.

The first-ever dog stamp was issued by Newfoundland in 1887 – a rose-red half-cent stamp with the head of a Newfoundland Dog. In 1972, the Government of Newfoundland declared the Newf its official animal emblem.

The Newfoundland Today

Today, Newfoundlands are well established all over the world. While the majority live as loved family members, many still work. Both France and Italy employ the breed as lifeguards, some of them dramatically leaping out of helicopters. Earlier this year, a Newfoundland named ‘Bilbo’ became the first fully qualified canine lifeguard in England; he patrols a beach at Sennen Cove in Cornwall.

In Canada and the U.S., Newfoundland Dogs can qualify for the titles Water Rescue Dog and Water Rescue Dog Excellent, but their abilities as lifeguards have not yet been utilized by any government agency in North America.

On this continent, Newfoundland Dogs are regularly used in therapy, for search and rescue, avalanche rescue, locating cadavers and as mobility service dogs. In recent years, Newfs have been excelling in ‘crisis response,’ providing emotional support for victims and rescuers at major disasters such as Hurricane Katrina. Some families with autistic children have opted to have a Newfoundland rather than a trained service dog.

Newfoundlands are as active as ever as draft dogs, but pulling carts, wagons and sleds is mostly a recreational activity now. Besides qualifying for carting titles, you’ll find Newfs giving rides at winter fairs and participating in parades with their decorated carts and wagons. Some families hitch up their Newf to a cart for the evening walk so the younger or handicapped children get to ride.

Special Characteristics

Newfoundlands are renowned for their gentle temperament, especially with children; this is considered a hallmark of the breed. They are excellent draft dogs and when hauling records were kept by the Guinness Book of World Records, a Newf held the title for the greatest proportional weight hauled – 52 times its weight. They are the strongest canine swimmers and the only canine designed for underwater and cold-water swimming, even in the middle of winter.

Unique features include a bear-like roll when walking, a long oily outer coat, webbing between the toes when the fetal foot is formed, swimming with a modified breast stroke, a tail that acts as a rudder, and tolling for fish."

(Peter Maniate)

All 'Drew and I can say in response is that "we're not dogs, we're Newfies".
And what a name, huh? "Man-I-Ate" You gotta love that!

Oh, the picture? From the top left, Karazan Preston, Karazan Axl, Karazan H2 (Hummer), and the King of Kings, Karazan I Love Paris (Paris).


Satchie

Brand Newf Day, Part 2

After reading the last blog entry, I've decided the best temporary way to deal with my woes is . . . the fine art of delusion.

And, accordingly, I've decided to recast my image of myself -- as it should be mind you.

I kind of like it. It's fitting, I dare say.


Satchie

Up For Adoption, Part 2

The day started out reasonably enough, with our 45 minute walk.
Then came the horror.

He makes us sit at the caffe for about an hour (I'm used to this kind of abuse) and then we start driving in the direction of the kennels. This cannot be a good sign but Andrew has not a clue so I'm on my own once again.

The pictures then tell a thousand words: we're using our Saturday to get refurbished. There is no show, there is nothing, and still we must endure the torture. So much so that even Andrew will not look at the bleeding camera.
What are we supposed to do, smile? Phhhlease!!!!!!!!!

After hours of this refurbishing (and Mrs. P slicing away my hair -- I can't say diddly when she's around), we get tied up outside the kennels while he plays with the other Newfies. What's that about. We're right bleeding here!!!!!!!!!!! Bibed and gagged. "Intolerable Cruelty" indeed.

Then to add insult to insult to injury, we get motorized down to Moore's Landing, where I understand the food is very good but have no actual knowledge thereof. The suggestion is made that we get some, but he says it's too close to dinner. Yeah, it's so close to dinnner that I'd really like to grab that steak out of his mouth.

Finally, we are relegated to a nice long drive home, clean and hungry (I don't like either). Andrew manages to put up with it, why I just don't know.

And then he wonders why I won't eat my "dog food".

This abuse must end. Please, somebody adopt me (Andrew too, even though he doesn't know how bad things are). Call the SPCN -- the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Newfies.

I'll try to be patient.


Sigh,

Satchel

Are Newfoundlands Smart?

FARMINGVILLE, N.Y. (CBS) ― "A Long Island dog-turned-MacGyver is making Lassie look like any other ordinary pooch. That's because Jackson, the massive 150-pound Newfoundland, somehow escaped harm during a house fire by jumping into a bathtub, pulling the curtain closed, and using the drain to breathe fresh air.

Jackson's owner, Debbie Credidio, nearly lost her best friend when her Farmingville home caught on fire while her 74-year-old mother, Marcia Kaye, was there.

'I said, 'The dog's in the house, but I couldn't get to where the dog was', Kaye told CBS 2.

The rest of the family was at work, but frantically rushed home to a chaotic scene. 'I came here, and the house was in flames full of smoke. I tried to get dog out, calling him -- I honestly didn't think the dog had a chance', said James Credidio.

Farmingville firefighters quickly arrived and made a final sweep through the house, and that's when they found Jackson in the bathtub.

'How he ever decided to go to where he went, it's amazing he did the right thing at the right time', said Fire Commissioner Norman Neill.

Firefighters were astounded to see that the dog somehow figured out that the drain would allow him to breathe.

'He's a big dog, about a 150-pound Newfoundland, and how he got in there and pulled the curtain closed -- it's the smartest thing. I don't know what kind of training he had', joked firefighter Jerry Curtin.

Whatever it was, Jackson's training was textbook -- right out of the firefighter's manual. A common mantra says to duck below the smoke if you run out of oxygen and find fresh air wherever you can. Jackson was literally inside the bathtub, sucking the air out of the drainpipe, an 'old school thing' that a firefighter would do.

'An hour later they pulled the dog out and it was like a miracle', James Credidio said.

The Credidios were more than thrilled to have their playful pal alive and well, even though the fire did its damage and the family had already just gone through tough times.

'If we would have lost him, it would have been like losing another piece of our family. We lost our dad last year, he was his best friend', said Jessica Credidio.

After losing her husband, Debbie Credidio says Jackson has just brought a little bit of happiness back into her life. 'He's a smart dog, he went in bathtub and sniffed the drain and made it out alive. I love my dog', she said.

Word is spreading around the Farmingville community about Jackson's intelligence. The entire neighborhood hopes to honor the heroic pooch with an award for 'valor under duress'."

Check out the video at wcbstv.com ("Miracle: Dog Uses Bath Drain To Breath Amid Fire")

Now the next time someone says that Newfies aren't smart, show 'em you know better.


Satchel & Andrew

The Legend of the Newfoundland

THE LEGEND OF THE NEWFOUNDLAND DOG


There is a land where the waves explode upon the reef in a boiling foam, there the legend was born.

As the story is told, God turned one day to contemplate all of his creations and saw on that Newfoundland Isle, flailed by storm a small nation of fishermen, whose rough, weather-beaten people fought courageously against the impervious elements of nature as the freezing cold winter and the unforgiving coastline took its toll, and the sea often asked the sacrifice of human life. Nevertheless, they remained deep-rooted, these men of Newfoundland with the stubbornness as great as their courage.

God saw, and in his infinite compassion, thought how he might alleviate their suffering. He searched among the creatures of his creations but found none that would serve. It was then he decided to create one anew.

He took the body of a bear, whose bone structure lent well to such arduous labours and whose thick fur would resist the bitter Newfoundland cold. Then he thought to sweeten this silhouette with the lithe, flexuous lines and movements of the seal, with all it’s prowess to swim and speedily slip between the waves.

Now turning to the sea, he saw the playful dolphins happily following the ships, their sweet, joy-filled eyes revealing their serene temperament, and more; they so love man that they often rescue them, saving them from the sea. Yes, they too would be part of this creature.

When he had done the moulding and casting, there suddenly appeared in his creative arms, a superb animal with glistening black fur; powerful and sweet in the same moment.

This new being, however, had to have an allegiance and faithfulness, tried and true, to be able to live beside man and be ever ready to offer his life for his master. It was at that moment that the Lord opened and placed in his chest, the heart of a dog, and the miracle was complete.

From that day onward, those men of the sea had beside them, their courageous companion ever strong, ever faithful the, Newfoundland Dog.

(Reprinted in translation from the book Il Cane Di Terra Nova by Emmy Bruno, editor Mursia-Milano)

The Newfoundland: Gentle Giant

"The Newfoundland is a dog with an outstanding temperament, good, courageous, generous, intelligent, human. Lord Byron wrote of one of this breed: "Beauty without vanity, courage without ferocity, strength without insolence, and all the virtues of a man without his vices." It is also a patient dog, mild with guests, and obsequious with its master. He is noble, calm, gentle, loyal and trustworthy with a sweet temperament. Dignified and peaceable. Very devoted. They can become so attached to their owners that they cannot adapt to a new home. Good and brave. Intelligent enough to act on his own when needed. Protective, but tends to place himself between the intruder and his family rather than bark or growl. Newfoundland's can recognize a dangerous situation and will generally act if the family is threatened. Any dog, other animal, child, or visitor who has no evil intention will receive a friendly welcome. Patient, playful, and loving with children; he is a born babysitter. Very sociable. Enjoys the outdoors, but also requires companionship. The Newfoundland drinks a lot of water and may be messy about it, as he loves to get wet. They tend to drool, though not as much as some other giant breeds. Although puppies require a lot of food, an adult Newfoundland eats only about as much as a retriever. They love to swim and if backpacking near water, don't let the Newfoundland carry your sleeping bag - or you may spend a very damp night!"
(See www.dogbreedinfo.com/newfoundlands)

As Grandpa used to say, "all a child really needs are good parents and a Newfoundland."


Satchie

Big Thanks To DogBreedInfo.com

Andrew and I (and all the Karazan clan) want to thank www.dogbreedinfo.com for bringing great information on Newfies and all breeds to the public.

We are particularly indebted to Sharon for her kindness and generosity.

Check out the site and the link to our pictures at http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/newfoundland.htm.

And also see some beautiful video of our buddy Gizmo at youtube.com. Just search for "gizmosav".


Satchie & Andrew

Karazan Gaia: Newfoundland Breed Standard Plus

Here is the Newfoundland Breed Standard.
The pictures are of Karazan Gaia, a Breed Standard Plus.
Mind you, this Big Boy is 7 (top picture) and looks and acts like a pup.
Everything about him screams "Breed Standard".


General Appearance
"The Newfoundland is a sweet-dispositioned dog that acts neither dull nor ill-tempered. He is a devoted companion. A multipurpose dog, at home on land and in water, the Newfoundland is capable of draft work and possesses natural lifesaving abilities. The Newfoundland is a large, heavily coated, well balanced dog that is deep-bodied, heavily boned, muscular, and strong. A good specimen of the breed has dignity and proud head carriage. The following description is that of the ideal Newfoundland. Any deviation from this ideal is to be penalized to the extent of the deviation. Structural and movement faults common to all working dogs are as undesirable in the Newfoundland as in any other breed, even though they are not specifically mentioned herein.

Size, Proportion, Substance
Average height for adult dogs is 28 inches, for adult bitches, 26 inches. Approximate weight of adult dogs ranges from 130 to 150 pounds, adult bitches from 100 to 120 pounds. The dog's appearance is more massive throughout than the bitch's. Large size is desirable, but never at the expense of balance, structure, and correct gait. The Newfoundland is slightly longer than tall when measured from the point of shoulder to point of buttocks and from withers to ground. He is a dog of considerable substance which is determined by spring of rib, strong muscle, and heavy bone.

Head
The head is massive, with a broad skull, slightly arched crown, and strongly developed occipital bone. Cheeks are well developed. Eyes are dark brown. (Browns and Grays may have lighter eyes and should be penalized only to the extent that color affects expression.) They are relatively small, deep-set, and spaced wide apart. Eyelids fit closely with no inversion. Ears are relatively small and triangular with rounded tips. They are set on the skull level with, or slightly above, the brow and lie close to the head. When the ear is brought forward, it reaches to the inner corner of the eye on the same side. Expression is soft and reflects the characteristics of the breed: benevolence, intelligence, and dignity. Forehead and face are smooth and free of wrinkles. Slope of the stop is moderate but, because of the well developed brow, it may appear abrupt in profile. The muzzle is clean-cut, broad throughout its length, and deep. Depth and length are approximately equal, the length from tip of nose to stop being less than that from stop to occiput. The top of the muzzle is rounded, and the bridge, in profile, is straight or only slightly arched. Teeth meet in a scissors or level bite. Dropped lower incisors, in an otherwise normal bite, are not indicative of a skeletal malocclusion and should be considered only a minor
deviation.

Neck, Topline, Body
The neck is strong and well set on the shoulders and is long enough for proud head carriage. The back is strong, broad, and muscular and is level from just behind the withers to the croup. The chest is full and deep with the brisket reaching at least down to the elbows. Ribs are well sprung, with the anterior third of the rib cage tapered to allow elbow clearance. The flank is deep. The croup is broad and slopes slightly.
Tail
Tail set follows the natural line of the croup. The tail is broad at the base and strong. It has no kinks, and the distal bone reaches to the hock. When the dog is standing relaxed, its tail hangs straight or with a slight curve at the end. When the dog is in motion or excited, the tail is carried out, but it does not curl over the back.

Forequarters
Shoulders are muscular and well laid back. Elbows lie directly below the highest point of the withers. Forelegs are muscular, heavily boned, straight, and parallel to each other, and the elbows point directly to the rear. The distance from elbow to ground equals about half the dog's height. Pasterns are strong and slightly sloping. Feet are proportionate to the body in size, webbed, and cat foot in type. Dewclaws may be removed.

Hindquarters
The rear assembly is powerful, muscular, and heavily boned. Viewed from the rear, the legs are straight and parallel. Viewed from the side, the thighs are broad and fairly long. Stifles and hocks are well bent and the line from hock to ground is perpendicular. Hocks are well let down. Hind feet are similar to the front feet. Dewclaws should be removed.

Coat
The adult Newfoundland has a flat, water-resistant, double coat that tends to fall back into place when rubbed against the nap. The outer coat is coarse, moderately long, and full, either straight or with a wave. The undercoat is soft and dense, although it is often less dense during the summer months or in warmer climates. Hair on the face and muzzle is short and fine. The backs of the legs are feathered all the way down. The tail is covered with long dense hair. Excess hair may be trimmed for neatness. Whiskers need not be trimmed.

Color
Color is secondary to type, structure, and soundness. Recognized Newfoundland colors are black, brown, gray, and white and black.
Solid Colors--Blacks, Browns, and Grays may appear as solid colors or solid colors with
white at any, some, or all, of the following locations: chin, chest, toes, and tip of tail. Any
amount of white found at these locations is typical and is not penalized. [Me and Gizmo. Hello judges!!!!] Also typical are a
tinge of bronze on a black or gray coat and lighter furnishings on a brown or gray coat.
Landseer--White base coat with black markings. Typically, the head is solid black, or
black with white on the muzzle, with or without a blaze. There is a separate black saddle
and black on the rump extending onto a white tail.
Markings, on either Solid Colors or Landseers, might deviate considerably from those
described and should be penalized only to the extent of the deviation. Clear white or
white with minimal ticking is preferred. Beauty of markings should be considered only when comparing dogs of otherwise comparable quality and never at the expense of type, structure and soundness.
Disqualifications-- Any colors or combinations of colors not specifically described are disqualified.

Gait
The Newfoundland in motion has good reach, strong drive, and gives the impression of effortless power. His gait is smooth and rhythmic, covering the maximum amount of ground with the minimum number of steps. Forelegs and hind legs travel straight forward. As the dog's speed increases, the legs tend toward single tracking. When moving, a slight roll of the skin is characteristic of the breed. Essential to good movement is the balance of correct front and rear assemblies.

Temperament
Sweetness of temperament is the hallmark of the Newfoundland; this is the most important single characteristic of the breed.

Disqualifications
Any colors or combinations of colors not specifically described are disqualified."

[Approved May 8, 1990
Effective June 28, 1990
1990© Newfoundland Club of America, Inc.]

Well, I can't just talk about myself all the time.
Or maybe I can!!!!!

Satchie

Andrew -- My Best Friend

It's time to re-introduce my best friend, Andrew.
Sure, we call him "And Drool" but he is the sweetest thing on earth and I thank Dog that he is with us.
Okay, I'll shut up and let the pictures do the talking.


Satchie

Without A Newf -- A Brand-Newf Song

Today's a day of giving thanks and there are just too many people to thank so we want to say to all our family and friends that we love you and hope you have a wonderful day -- everyday.

Most of all, we want to thank Mrs. P, for giving Big Jack to Dad when others would not, and for giving us Andrew when Jack went to the Big Sea. We love you Mrs. P.!!!

And now for another piece of work, we offer another variation on a theme:

* * * * * * * * * *


Without A Newf


Without a Newf, the day would never end.
Without a Newf the road would never bend.
When things go wrong, a man ain't got a friend
Without a Newf.

That field of corn would never see a plow.
That field of corn would be deserted now.
A man is born, but he's no good no-how
Without a Newf.

I got my troubles and woe,
but sure as I know that joy in will roll
I'll get along as long as a Newf is strong in my soul

I'll never know what makes the rain to fall
I'll never know what makes the grass so tall
I only know there ain't no love at all
Without a Newf!!

* * * * * * *

(If we don't say so ourselves)

All rights (not liabilities) reserved,

Satch And Drool, LLC

It's A Brand Newf Day

An original piece of work by Satch And Drool, LLC

* * * * *

Brand Newf Day

How many of you people out there
Been hurt in some kind of love affair
And how many times do you swear that you'll never love again?

How many lonely, sleepless nights
How many lies, how many fights
And why would you want to put yourself through all that again?

"Love is pain," I hear you say
Love has a cruel and bitter way
Of paying you back for all the faith you ever had in your brain

How could it be that what you need the most
Can leave you feeling just like a ghost?
You never want to feel so sad and lost again

One day you could be looking
Through an old book in rainy weather
You see a picture of her smiling at you
When you were still together
You could be walking down the street
And who should you chance to meet
But that same old smile that you've been thinking of all day

You can turn the clock to zero, honey
I'll sell the stock, we'll spend all the money
We're starting up a Brand Newf day

Turn the clock all the way back
I wonder if she'll take me back
I'm thinking in a Brand Newf way

Turn the clock to zero, sister
You'll never know how much I missed her
Starting up a Brand Newf day

Turn the clock to zero, boss
The river's wide, we'll swim across
Started up a Brand Newf day

It could happen to you - just like it happened to me
There's simply no immunity - there's no guarantee
I say love's such a force - if you find yourself in it
And sometimes no reflection is there

Baby wait a minute, wait a minute
Wait a minute, wait a minute
Wait a minute, wait a minute

Turn the clock to zero, honey
I'll sell the stock, we'll spend all the money
We're starting up a Brand Newf day

Turn the clock to zero, Mac
I'm begging her to take me back
I'm thinking in a Brand Newf way

Turn the clock to zero, boss
The river's wide, we'll swim across
Started up a Brand Newf day

Turn the clock to zero buddy
Don't wanna be no fuddy duddy
Started up a Brand Newf day

I'm the rhythm in your tune
I'm the sun and you're the moon
I'm a bat and you're the cave
You're the beach and I'm the wave
I’m the plow and you’re the land
You're the glove and I'm the hand
I'm the train and you're the station
I'm a flagpole to your nation - yeah

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
Starting up a Brand Newf day

I'm the present to your future
You're the wound and I’m the suture
You're the magnet to my pole
I'm the devil in your soul
You're the pupil I'm the teacher
You're the church and I'm the preacher
You're the flower I'm the rain
You're the tunnel I'm the train

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
Starting up a Brand Newf day

You're the crop to my rotation
You're the sum of my equation
I'm the answer to your question
If you follow my suggestion
We can turn this ship around
We'll go up instead of down
You're the pan and I'm the handle
You're the flame and I'm the candle

Stand up all you lovers in the world
Stand up and be counted every boy and every girl
Stand up all you lovers in the world
We're starting up a Brand Newf day.

* * * *

Brand Newf -- you just can't say enou-newf about it.